How To Prepare for Marriage in Your Single Season?

We’ve all heard that phrase: “prepare for marriage while you’re single.” It’s been preached, posted, and repeated in so many ways. But what if I told you… we’ve been approaching and looking at it in the wrong way?

That’s what inspired me to create and write this blog post.

As a single woman, I often felt this subtle pressure to “prepare” for marriage by doing things that look good on the outside—things that seem wife-like. You know, cooking, cleaning, learning to manage a home, trying to check all the boxes.

And let me tell you—there’s nothing wrong with doing those things. But when that’s our sole focus, we end up frustrated and missing the bigger picture.

Let me explain.

How To Prepare for Marriage in Your Single Season?

Misconception #1: Preparing for Marriage = Mastering Homemaking Skills

Many single women today feel the pressure to “prepare for the title of wife.”
And what happens? We start fixating on doing all the things we think a wife should do—cooking, cleaning, homemaking, and managing a household.

And Yes, cooking, cleaning, and managing a home are valuable life skills—but they’re not exclusive to being a wife. You’re not preparing to be someone’s maid. You’re not preparing to check off a title. You’re preparing for something deeper.

Think about it: If you study scripture even in biblical times, many wives had servants who helped them with household chores like cooking and cleaning . Even the Proverbs 31 woman managed her household, yes, but her worth went far beyond chores. So why are we limiting wifehood to tasks?

What Truly Matters: Vision + Alignment

Another misconception I had to unlearn is that being “equally yoked” just means marrying someone who shares your faith. But here’s what I discovered: faith alone is not enough.

Purpose and vision matter too.

It’s not just about finding a Christian man. It’s about aligning visions, purposes, and spiritual callings. Just because someone loves Jesus doesn’t mean they’re someone you should pursue to be married to.

I had to learn that. Just being equally yoked in faith doesn’t mean you’re aligned in purpose. And when you’re choosing a life partner, vision matters, purpose matters, values matter, and life direction and calling also matter.

Because marriage is not just about romantic chemistry or titles. It’s about kingdom alignment and assignment.

So How Do You Prepare for Marriage?

Here’s the truth: Preparing for marriage is not about becoming a wife—because if God has called you to marriage, you’re already a wife in the spirit. In God’s eyes, you’re already a wife.

Instead what you need to focus on is becoming a woman of God.

Because that is what you’re really called to become is a woman of God.

When I started walking more closely with the Lord back in 2021, everything changed. I wasn’t chasing a husband—I was chasing God. And in that process, I learned submission.

Because if you can’t submit to God… I assure you won’t know how to submit to a husband. And you would not submit to your husband

The truth is—submission isn’t about silencing your voice. It’s about surrender. It’s about saying, “God, I really want this, but nevertheless, your will be done.”

Submitting is not about not having a say but it’s when you want to do something your way and you choose to accept what God says or if it’s your husband what he says.

That’s the life of a godly woman. And that is preparation—not just for marriage, but for life.

Jesus modeled this perfectly. And as women walking with God, we are called to model this too.

So when you get married, submission doesn’t start. It simply transfers—from God to your husband as unto the Lord.

There wouldn’t need to be a major shift or drastic transformation to submit to your husband, because you’ve already been practicing submission in your walk with God—so it naturally flows into your marriage.

Check Your Submission Today

So how are you submitting to the authority figures in your life now? Your boss, your leaders, your parents, even God?

Honestly ask yourself: How do I respond to authority now?

Your ability to walk in humility and obedience in your current season is telling. Because when you get married, submission won’t suddenly become easier—it’ll just shift roles.

Character Is the Real Curriculum

So let’s talk about what actually matters in preparing for marriage in your single season?: And that is Character.

Things like…

• Healthy communication
• Conflict resolution
• Patience
• Forgiveness
• A quiet and gentle spirit is important

And these are not just “wife skills.” These are life skills. And they matter right now—whether you’re single, dating, or married.

Developing these traits is important because you are a daughter of the Most High God. And marriage just becomes a byproduct of that spiritual formation.

Heal Before You Love

One thing I strongly believe: Healing also matters.
Heal your traumas before marriage.

If you’ve got unresolved trauma around vulnerability, romance, trust, or intimacy—work through those wounds and deal with them now. Not for a ring. Not for a wedding. But for your healing, wholeness, and freedom.

And also not just so you can “be ready” for a man, but so you can be whole for yourself, and healthy before God.

Your healing isn’t just for marriage. It’s part of your transformation into the woman God designed you to be.

Marriage Is Not a Destination

The thing is marriage is not a destination where you arrive and stop growing. You’ll still learn. You’ll still struggle. You’ll still face trails, and You’ll still have to seek God.

Both you and your husband will continue evolving—together and separately.

So the pressure to be “perfect” before marriage? Release it. Let it go. Also release the idea that marriage is the ultimate goal. That’s not what God is asking of you.

But it’s a continuation of the refining journey you’ve already been on with him

Final Word: This Is About God, Not Just Marriage

So here’s the heart of it and the final point I want to leave you with:

Take your eyes off of “preparing for marriage” yes it’s a great desire and God wants this for us because he is the one who established and created the union of marriage. As well as yes he wants us to pray to be our future marriages and husband but what is most important is that we put our eyes on Jesus first.

Stop focusing so much on preparing to be a wife, and start focusing on becoming a woman after God’s own heart.

Our real preparation is your walk with God. It’s in our daily surrender. It’s in letting Him shape us, prune us, and mature us.

Whether marriage is part of your story or not, you are already in preparation—for everything God has for you.

You don’t need a wife bootcamp or a 30-day challenge to be a wife. You need intimacy with God. Because he will equip you for every good work—including marriage.

Let your journey with God be your preparation. Let your submission to him shape your character. And know that, when the time is right, you will be ready.

Because he is preparing you—for everything he has for you.

And marriage may be a part of your story, but it’s not the whole story.

The real goal? Becoming like Christ and Submitting to God

Final Thoughts

So the next time you feel that pressure to prepare for marriage—internally or from the world—remember this: Your walk with God is the real preparation. Becoming a Godly woman after God’s heart is the real preparation.

For the scripture says in Proverbs 19:14 – House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent wife is from the LORD.

So you’re called to marriage, you’re already a wife in the spirit. Just trust God’s timing, lean into his process, and become the woman who reflects his heart—whether or not a ring is on your finger.

Stay in Him. Grow in Him. Heal with Him. Walk with Him. Because everything else—including marriage—will be added in its time.

If this blessed you, don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe for more posts like this. And as always—keep thriving, keep growing, and keep seeking His heart.